30 Flirty and Fabulous
Sitting in a small cafe at Paracas - a beach resort town located around 5 hours away from Lima, Peru - the truth is I still can’t wrap my head around what had happened in my life the last 12 months. Okay maybe 10 years to be exact. This time last week I was in New York City celebrating my 30th birthday with my loved ones. Nothing too fancy or crazy, well since I’ve moved a lot from one place to another lately, I just wanted to slow down a bit. To do couple of my favourite things like watching broadway shows and picnic at Central Park. But most importantly, I want to take sometime to appreciate and reflect on how much I’ve grown over the last 10 years. And today I’m in Peru with a grateful heart, excited to visit Huacachina in the next few hours and slowly making my way to Machu Picchu. I’ve been dreaming about Peru for years and honestly so happy that I finally made it to South America.
My God, life is grand. I remember last year, July 6 was my last day at work. After 2,5 years doing things I love, I found myself craving for new challenges. I wanted to learn new things so bad but there was no room to grow left for me. I learned that when a thing has served its purpose, it will go away. If you try to hold on to something that has already fulfilled its purpose in your life, you are going to hurt yourself. If holding on is disturbing your peace of mind, it makes sense to let go. And it’s absolutely okay to outgrow people. You’re allowed to move on. At the beginning of course it was scary to let go, to give up all my privileges but something told me I’ll be doing just fine. I’ve done this before, many times and I survived. As long as I put my happiness first, growth over comfort, stay true to myself, things would eventually fall into place. Even though let’s be honest here it’s not easy to step out of your comfort zone, but it’s always worth it. I love the whole idea of myself discovering new passions, visiting new places I’ve never been before, attracting new interesting, like-minded people maybe bigger opportunities…You never know, really. They say magical things happen outside your little bubble, and so I packed my bags, go into the unknown and do things I love most: traveling, writing, photography, meeting people. It’s funny how I told myself let’s travel for 3 months, learn French in Nice because that’s one things I’ve always wanted to do, and see what’s gonna happen. But then I secretly had this little wish to celebrate my birthday for a year full ( you only turn 30 once so might as well make the most of it, go big or go home, right? ) The universe granted my wishes, 11 months later: 23 countries and more than 60 cities. The biggest and best gift I’ve ever received in my life. Also bonus: I celebrated my birthday in New York City with my favourite human being by my side. I find it’s amazing how last year I was unhappy, stress, experienced breakdown and anxiety for the first time in my life then the moment I decided to take control, change it…life rewarded me with a lot of surprises, miracles I don’t even think words can describe it.
Yes, the past 10 years I’ve grown a lot. I’m grateful I’ve made the most of my twenties. Most of my dreams have come true. I’ve had soooo much fun, always surrounded by good people and just the fact life has been incredibly kind to give me opportunities that not everyone can have. I’ve seen and experienced things I never thought I could. I’ve met and learned from so many incredibly kind, inspiring people. From a 20-year-old Gyscha who left Jakarta with very little experience, little money, only a luggage full of dreams and faith somehow things would work out just fine. She was so brave, energetic, confident and fearless, something that I wish would stay with me forever. All she ever wanted was to be happy, to grow and to truly live. She moved to a new country alone, not knowing anyone but then she found true friends, family, love. She discovered so many passions, reinvented herself, witnessed her dreams come true. Along the journey, she also failed a lot. There are days when she just wanted to hide and cry and give up. Sometimes she’d wonder if anyone else fails as much as her and how do they get back on their feet. How some people can be so incredibly lucky to do meaningful things they love and be a part of exciting projects. She fell in and out of love too. She kissed so many frogs and ended up with so many disappointments and heartbreaks, but she learned her lessons and continue to love. In the end of the day, people come and go, but as long as she put self love and self worth first, she’d only continue to rise and shine.
In the next 10 years, I hope I’d be the same energetic-happy-healthy-positive-strong-bright-fearless-bold-curious-creative Gyscha. I know life doesn’t get any easier but on the hardest days where I’d hit the rock bottom, fail, or going through the worst - I hope I’d always find reasons to be more grateful, to be patient and positive, to smile, to love, to celebrate life. I hope life would give me strength, miracles, guidance, inspirations so I can keep going. I still want to see the world too. From Africa to Asia to Europe then North and South America, I can’t wait to see where life gonna take me next. Maybe someday I’d love to bring my future kids and husband traveling with me. Just like how my Mom used to take me on road trips when I was a kid and my curiosity about life and the world grew from there, I would love to do the same thing to my children. Travel has changed the way I live my life. Those of us who travel are a privileged few. Not only I get to find a bit of myself and my purpose in every place I’ve visited, but the more I travel, the more I realize how lucky and blessed we are to have access and opportunities to chase and live our dreams while so many people out there have to fight harder, sometimes can’t even dream. And I would love to give back more, to create meaningful things for others. In the next 10 years, I hope I’d still be able to live. To TRULY live. To go on wild adventures, to pole dance my heart and butt out, to laugh til my stomach hurts, to never stop growing, to come home to a place surrounded by my loved ones who always give me space, time and freedom to be myself. Inspire and motivate me to never stop growing and improving.
And finally not a day goes by that I’m not thankful for some special people in my life who support me, comfort me, uplift me, always been there for me from day one. People who opened up the doors for me, who gave me stage to shine, room to grow, opportunities. I am truly lucky to meet and learn from each one of you. I never thought I’d say this but yes it feels good to get older and learn more each day. To grow at my own pace and simply to live the kind of life I have always dreamed of. It’s just gonna get better from here…